Thứ Tư, Tháng Chín 28, 2022
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Throwway account, sorry long rant:

I cannot believe I have wasted almost 2 decade in front of a screen playing video games.. I’m almost 30 years old but I have the knowledge of a 13 years old, I don’t know anything about life, I just realized that I’m very naive, it feels like time has stopped for me?

Like, im 13 years old me in a 30 years old body, I don’t have emotional maturity nor emotional intelligence.

I don’t have experiences, character growth and that I cannot relate to other people because I haven’t gone through life, I haven’t lived nor experienced life.

I dropped out of highschool at 17 and my mom took care of me all these years, I have been a NEET for 13 years. It feels like I just woke up from a coma and I’m rediscovering life again for the first time. I’m ashamed. I guess this is what we call brain fog / mental clarity now..

Tbh, Im not sure if I was addicted or not, I just used to LOVE gaming. It was everything for me, I could escape from reality and do anything I wanted.

For most of the time, I used to play for hours, every day. I did take a break: one year here and another there. Both times I would start reading books (I used to be an avid reader before 13) but for the most part it was gaming for me.

I was able to quit cold turkey twice and I just quit again 3 months ago, so I’m at 3 now.. I don’t think I was addicted maybe a little I’m not sure but I just used to love gaming, gaming had everything for himself. .

there is a book in most games, a mini movie, a nice soundtrack and gameplay, it’s the best type of entertainment. but I just realized that I was scared of life, to face reality, growing up and all my responsibilities.

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